Life had been a beautiful and fantastic experience till now. With all it's ups and downs, I have traversed 38 years of my life. Today when I am on my late 30's and moving towards the zone of 40's, I feel to reflect back and retreat a bit to pick the life experiences so as to lead a much liberated life beyond 40.
Born in a lower middle class family, it was quite clear to me at a very early age that life will be hard. It will not be a smooth cat walk. At every step of my life I had to work hard to the extreme to achieve the desired goal. But to share frankly, when I reflect back and look into my struggles I feel proud that I could do it and learned a lot from the experiences. Many a time when the struggle was on my face, I used to cry out loud saying, "Why me? Why have you forsaken me O Lord?" But the fragmented power deep within me always used to get charged at right time and get accumulated to give me an infinite strength to go ahead in life with a better perspective. It happened every time I felt myself indulged in a threatened position in my life.
I did many mistakes in my life. All my mistakes are like shinning stars which always guided my direction in life and hope it will do the same in my future too. All the mistakes helped me to pill out the dry scale of my life similar to the onions and make it more and more smoother.
At one point of time I realized that I am different in many ways from the large section of society. It was challenging for me to stand with all that differences. But I stood firm slowly but steadily. I was apologetic for my differences since long. But at one point of time my exposure to life and liberative education (basically during my Masters in Social Work) enlightened me to accept myself and lead a liberative life.
Till date I got everything in my life. I am happy for whatever I am today. I feel really obliged to my parents, sister, friends and my teachers who helped me to reach this phase of my life where my profession and passion is the same. I am happy with my work and with my income. I have become so liberal in my thoughts. I am able to see things from different perspectives. I accept things and let go things as it comes and leaves.
I feel that my life after 40 should be a life that I should enjoy doing what I feel like to do. I want to live a life without any fear. I want to be free. My experience shows that freedom can only be possible with right kind of knowledge and attitude. I will try my best to gain such knowledge which will make me free. One very important thing that I will try my best to do is to live with "truth". I learned that truth only can make you free. At this age I feel that I need to depend fully on "truth". I will see that my mind is not broken up into fragments of any kind of biases and prejudices. I will try to move towards perfection with all my limitations to ensure that I don't thrive to become saint. I will try to look things with more rationale. All the actions of mine will be to restore human dignity within me and outside me. I will see that I am not influenced by any kind or form of institutional religion. I will be critical to everything that I do, I see and I learn. I feel deeply that I need to become more human and that will be my only thirst for henceforth.
One of the quest that I see for myself in near future is to look for some one who will hold me deep within his heart and look on my face to understand me. I feel that a friend in my life is something that will make me more human in future. But if that doesn't happen I don't think that it will make me low or depressed or lonely in any way. I have now slowly learned to live a life of solitude, A life where in I am deeply soaked within me. I have experienced a life where I am drunk with my own wine. I can live a life with myself. Actually I have seen that life with yourself is less complex rather than in any kind of relationship.
When I will reach 39 next year, i.e., in 2017, I will try to go for a long meditation, may be Vipasana, to look into myself in much better way and find some new goal for the life post 40s.
Thanks you each and everyone for my beautiful life.
Born in a lower middle class family, it was quite clear to me at a very early age that life will be hard. It will not be a smooth cat walk. At every step of my life I had to work hard to the extreme to achieve the desired goal. But to share frankly, when I reflect back and look into my struggles I feel proud that I could do it and learned a lot from the experiences. Many a time when the struggle was on my face, I used to cry out loud saying, "Why me? Why have you forsaken me O Lord?" But the fragmented power deep within me always used to get charged at right time and get accumulated to give me an infinite strength to go ahead in life with a better perspective. It happened every time I felt myself indulged in a threatened position in my life.
I did many mistakes in my life. All my mistakes are like shinning stars which always guided my direction in life and hope it will do the same in my future too. All the mistakes helped me to pill out the dry scale of my life similar to the onions and make it more and more smoother.
At one point of time I realized that I am different in many ways from the large section of society. It was challenging for me to stand with all that differences. But I stood firm slowly but steadily. I was apologetic for my differences since long. But at one point of time my exposure to life and liberative education (basically during my Masters in Social Work) enlightened me to accept myself and lead a liberative life.
Till date I got everything in my life. I am happy for whatever I am today. I feel really obliged to my parents, sister, friends and my teachers who helped me to reach this phase of my life where my profession and passion is the same. I am happy with my work and with my income. I have become so liberal in my thoughts. I am able to see things from different perspectives. I accept things and let go things as it comes and leaves.
I feel that my life after 40 should be a life that I should enjoy doing what I feel like to do. I want to live a life without any fear. I want to be free. My experience shows that freedom can only be possible with right kind of knowledge and attitude. I will try my best to gain such knowledge which will make me free. One very important thing that I will try my best to do is to live with "truth". I learned that truth only can make you free. At this age I feel that I need to depend fully on "truth". I will see that my mind is not broken up into fragments of any kind of biases and prejudices. I will try to move towards perfection with all my limitations to ensure that I don't thrive to become saint. I will try to look things with more rationale. All the actions of mine will be to restore human dignity within me and outside me. I will see that I am not influenced by any kind or form of institutional religion. I will be critical to everything that I do, I see and I learn. I feel deeply that I need to become more human and that will be my only thirst for henceforth.
One of the quest that I see for myself in near future is to look for some one who will hold me deep within his heart and look on my face to understand me. I feel that a friend in my life is something that will make me more human in future. But if that doesn't happen I don't think that it will make me low or depressed or lonely in any way. I have now slowly learned to live a life of solitude, A life where in I am deeply soaked within me. I have experienced a life where I am drunk with my own wine. I can live a life with myself. Actually I have seen that life with yourself is less complex rather than in any kind of relationship.
When I will reach 39 next year, i.e., in 2017, I will try to go for a long meditation, may be Vipasana, to look into myself in much better way and find some new goal for the life post 40s.
Thanks you each and everyone for my beautiful life.
